


Nec-romanc-y

by AvidReader3019



Series: Pinescone Necromancy AU [1]
Category: Gravity Falls, Over the Garden Wall (Cartoon & Comics)
Genre: Dorks, Fluff, Near Death Experiences, Necromancy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-20
Updated: 2020-10-20
Packaged: 2021-03-08 19:54:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,811
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27122114
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AvidReader3019/pseuds/AvidReader3019
Summary: This is how it all began: How does a necromancer even meet death anyway?
Relationships: Dipper Pines/Wirt (Over the Garden Wall)
Series: Pinescone Necromancy AU [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1979681
Comments: 2
Kudos: 27
Collections: Over The Gravity Falls





	Nec-romanc-y

It’s so funny how people say moments that change the course of your life always start as normal as any other day. For Wirt this was not at all the case. He knew he was walking into trouble the moment he awoke that wild day, but he would have never considered the exact nature of the following events.

He had been reading some, waiting for reports to come in, wallowing in eternal misery, trying not to think too hard about life, thinking too hard about the words on the page without reading any of them at all. It all abruptly dissolved into a distinct feeling of things being  _ wrong _ . A slight buzzing in the back of his mind coming from that weird part that signals when a death is particularly dangerous, a part he hadn’t heard since well he couldn’t even remember the last time and it had never been this strong. He paced around the floor for a bit before deciding to check it out. He unfortunately, doesn’t carry much power at all. He rips souls from one life and shoves them into another. Thankfully, he decided to take the transportation schtick because he’d heard sorting afterlives was a  _ nightmare _ . The price was never being able to really associate with anyone and working alone, but that was just fine with him… mostly. He takes a breath and crosses over to find the source of the signal, after all, no matter how bad it was, it’s not like it could really do anything to him.

Dipper was another case entirely. He had no idea of anything honestly, he didn’t think it was going to work. Is he a good researcher? Yes. Good at magic? Of course. Good at drawing in an incomprehensible and probably fictional entity? Not so much. It wasn’t like he could practice beforehand because the ingredients for the potion were super expensive and he wouldn’t be able to afford another. See, he’d been trying to prove necromancy as a valid school of magic for years now. His research was viewed as substantial for anyone who actually decided to take a look, but most still weren’t willing to even consider it as anything other than forbidden to anyone who wanted to keep their soul. He decided to look at the nature of death itself which led to a rabbit hole and eventually it was 4 A.M and he was on an article on psychopomps and they were one of the few things people still weren’t sure about. Most creatures have been documented and proved as real or fictional at this point, but not these. If he could find these, if they were real, the recognition of such a discovery could provide a platform to share his research and convince people to stop trying to burn him at the stake. (sometimes literally, it happens) He threw herself into research at that point and came up with the plan.

He found a potion that would allow him to be dead for a couple minutes. Just long enough to hopefully signal any sort of soul ferrying creature. After that, he can unexpectedly grab ‘em, and  _ should  _ be able to use a spell to keep them in place just long enough to talk. If that doesn’t work, he set up a ritualistic circle that should’ve been able to trap anything undead. It’s as prepared as he was going to get, so he went ahead and drank the potion which, ugh, those are never pleasant. He only got through the thought of  _ maybe I could try to add flavor- _ before hitting the floor unconscious.

He wakes up to a very fidgety figure, and he hadn’t even known a shadow could be described as “fidgety” but it seemed to fit. The figure was standing a good five feet away and  _ it worked, _ well, He didn't want to get too excited in case this wasn’t a psychopomp, but if it was… Dipper mentally prepared a spell to contain any undead beings. He wasn’t sure if it would work on this, but he could at least try. Before he can however, the figure turns and freezes him in place, forcing him to stare at shifting colors where their eyes would theoretically be. There’s every color Dipper’s ever seen and more he can’t wrap his brain around. Almost as if all the color leached out of them from the shifting shadows that make up their form had to go  _ somewhere _ and chose to become their eyes. The spinning colors narrow briefly into slits, the shadows start to disappear from the bottom up slowly, and Dipper does the only thing he can think of at the moment. He reaches a hand out to stop them, and is somehow now  _ holding  _ shadow. The first thing that registers is it’s freezing, burning in its cold intensity. A cold that travels easily through his fingers, right through the skin, and sinks down into his bones. He shivers and ignores the creeping numbness inching up his arm, barely managing to get out a “Wait!”

The shadow jerks in what Dipper would call surprise if he didn’t know any better, but it quickly turns back around, focusing intently on the hand clutching their shoulder? Arm? Non-specific shadow limb? Dipper swallows his fear and lets go of it quickly, beginning to rub his hands together, hoping to get some feeling back, while taking a few deep breaths to steady himself.

“Can I talk to you for a second? I have some questions.” He gestures vaguely at the laboratory desk with her elbow. It’s covered in papers, mugs, jars of glowing substances, and busted pens. “I could offer you something in return. I'm just not sure what you want? I can probably spare a pint of blood, that's the Red Cross’s standard, right? A pint is fine to lose and be okay? Or better yet I have some cookies somewhere they’re probably just well, sugar and glitter flavored, mostly. Wait, do you know what cookies are?” Dipper pauses to breathe and check the figure’s demeanor, and when it doesn’t so much as  _ blink _ he continues, “Okay well so they’re like these disks? They’re food! I should’ve said that first. They’re sweet usually and they make you feel better and just are nice. Wait, do you know what sweet is? It’s like-”

“Yes”

Dipper pauses not sure he heard right, but the next muttered reply couldn’t have been imagined. 

“Yes I know what cookies are.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah.”

The silence stretches out for a small eternity that is more like a minute.

“Well do you want some?”

The shadow shifts again. Watching it move is disorienting, like trying to keep your eyes locked on one moving dot in a field with millions of moving dots that are all the same color. Like he could only perceive a  _ piece  _ of the motion happening with his limited senses. It was disorienting and fascinating. The shadow shrugs, but keeps shifting, maybe they’re incapable of being still?

Dipper smiles, ingenuine as ever, and tries to seem as non-threatening as possible. “I’ll go find those then.” He leaves and grabs the cookies which in hindsight it seems like a really dumb plan to leave the unknown entity in the basement, but he just died and came back to life, so he probably wasn’t in the best frame of mind.

Wirt on the other hand was freaking out. He phased in, not expecting anything real strenuous and then  _ and then _ this guy, this necromancer, who he was all prepared to give a stern lecture or possibly fight just talked to him? Offering cookies? Explaining what cookies are and not at all worried about the literal shadow of impending doom standing before her and… what? 

He hadn’t talked to a mortal in centuries other than “Yes, this is a part of the natural process. No, there’s nothing you can bribe me with” Maybe those sort of bargains would come later? Some people took a bit longer, but no, not this mortal. He knew this one was being 100% genuine. Wirt could get a feeling for someone’s general intent and he couldn’t sense any kind of deceit or plan which is actually far  _ more _ troubling. He seems genuinely anxious about whether or not he has cookies to offer, so maybe he’s using some sort of device to shut down Wirt’s abilities or scramble them in some way? It doesn’t seem like it. He should be able to tell if his own abilities were being messed up, right?

Meanwhile, Dipper leans against the counter, heart pounding in his chest from the encounter. There’s a shadow being in his laboratory, a shadow that should essentially be the grim reaper if his research was correct. Not at all what he’d expected. They seemed nice? Polite? Weirdly into the whole cookie idea? Why hadn’t they just left?  _ Well you did grab their arm. _ A fair point, but also they were probably powerful enough to just leave, right? If they could teleport in they could teleport out, so then, why didn’t they?

A crash from downstairs shook him from the thoughts. He quickly grabbed a glittery, sticky box of cookies on the top shelf and ran back downstairs. What he saw kinda surprised him. Instead of the wreckage of what was once his slightly-already-wrecked laboratory that was expected, the creature seemed to be picking up some chalk from the floor? It seemed like a cup had fallen off the table and they were trying to place the chalk back, but the shadow itself had sort of shifted from a humanoid figure to one with writhing tentacle-like appendages that were made of the same shadow as the rest of their form. Dipper stood in shock in the doorway for a second dumbstruck before realizing that the moving shadows were the problem. Every time the being picked up a piece one of the appendages ended up knocking over something else. This seemed to make the creature more anxious which caused more knocking over and more things on the floor, nothing dangerous for now, but it would end up that way if they continued. Dipper couldn’t help but burst out laughing at the sight. Blame it on the stress, but the sight of a grim reaper anxiously making a mess of his notebooks and pencils was too much after all that had happened. He’d been worried about getting killed by this thing a few minutes ago, but now that seemed completely ridiculous. 

The shadow turned at the sound of laughter and stared wide-eyed. Those multi-colored disks narrowed once again and Dipper didn’t even have the presence of mind to be frightened it’d been too long a day. He thrusted the box of cookies at the shadow and picked up the scattered supplies while they silently glided to the edge of the room. There’s a slight ‘pop’ as the container opens and Dipper paused to watch and see what they thought. He hoped the glitter was the edible kind this time. Him and Mabel had eaten so much of the regular kind he was  _ fairly _ sure it couldn’t bother them, but he wasn’t sure what it would do to this creature. Maybe just sorta make him upset? Not kill him or anything. The immortal being probably wouldn’t be brought down by glitter, but hey weirder weaknesses existed.

Luckily, he didn’t seem to get hurt, in fact there was a soft crunching noise before a small hum of approval, so Dipper decided to stop stalling and get into things. “Like I said earlier I have some questions if you don’t mind?”

“What sorts of questions because if it’s like bringing back somebody look I can’t be doing something like that-”

‘Nah I already know how to do that. Resurrection isn’t the problem. I don’t need you to  _ do _ anything really. I just want to know a couple things about your uh work I guess is probably the right word, anyway just what sorts of things do you like do you have any hobbies just a standard type interview.”

The shadow just stared for a moment blinking slowly. He continued in a softer voice than before. “Why.”

“I’m sorry?”

“I mean why would you want to know anything I’m not- I don’t I people don’t want to know anything. I’m darkness, the despair you feel when you lose a loved one, the shadow of mortality that stains your every choice knowing you’ll run out of time sooner rather than later, I am the embodiment of regret. Why on earth would I even have hobbies other than causing torment? Why would you even want to know if I did? You should just hate me for existing. How do you know I’m not going to just kill you on a whim or something?”

Dipper tilted his head skeptically and looked them up and down slowly, stopping to gesture towards the cookie box. “You liking those cookies was my first clue. I know for a fact they suck compared to actually good cookies. I'm not much of a baker and they’re mostly burned, so my suspicion is that you haven’t had anything sweet like that in a while. The afterlife or whatever I assume doesn’t have a lot of desserts or hell maybe they do! I wouldn’t know that’s what I’m getting at.” He shrugged and threw his hands up. “We don't know  _ anything  _ and everyone just assumes it’s bad. The things that we see as scary or to be avoided are only part of the natural cycle, and instead of trying to learn and ask questions of the right people everyone just tries to fight it.” Dipper sighed and brought a hand down his face. “Look, I think you’re not too different from me, constantly getting yelled at and reprimanded for trying to just do a job well because it mostly happens in the dark.” He took a breath. “Dark doesn’t necessarily mean bad and unknown doesn’t either. It just means there are just more things to be explored and discovered in those places. With you specifically I mean I can’t hate someone that I don’t even know. Let me ask you some things, we can get to know each other, and  _ then _ I can hate you.” He smiled and gestured towards some chairs in the corner. “What do you say?”

The shadow was silent for a minute or so and Dipper held his breath the entire time. He knew this thing was dangerous, but he didn’t seem to really be out to hurt him. If he wanted to he could have already, but what if he just said it was stupid and left? Then he would have literally died for nothing. He’s drawn out of his spiralling thoughts with a soft response.

“Okay.”

Dipper blinks. “Really?”

The creature made a sort of shrugging gesture that was lost in the writhing shadows behind him. “You gave me the first cookie I’ve had since… well before they even started calling them that. Plus, your point that knowing about things make them seem less scary.” He took a deep breath and let out a weary sigh. “I’d like that to be the case. I’d like that very much.”

“Well that’s settled then, let’s we can sit down over there and give me a second to grab my notes-”

“Actually if we’re going to be uh talking and all that I’d like to do something first as long as you promise not to tell anyone about this.”

Color him intrigued. “Sure man no problem this can be off the record, what is it?”

He took a step back and the shadows that had been present the entire time started to fade. They slowly retreated to join the shadows in the room where the candlelight didn’t penetrate, but it wasn’t just the ones that had been behind him. His form was slowly dissolving? Changing? They faded away to leave behind a person who looked startlingly  _ human _ . His eyes still held the same colors as before, but they were only in the irises now, making them seem otherwise normal. 

When Dipper didn’t speak he shifted uncomfortably and pulled the sleeves of his sweater down to fiddle with them. “This is how I look normally without all the scary bits for the job. I have an image I’m supposed to maintain, but if we’ll be getting to know each other, I figure you might as well see how I actually look. Plus I’m more comfortable like this and won’t knock over your stuff.”

Dipper nodded and barely managed to peel his eyes from the cute guy in front of him to grab his notebook. Luckily it was one of the last times he wouldn’t be allowed to stare shamelessly and they continued with the interview which turned into a date and then many dates… 


End file.
